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Scope of This Assessment

What follows is offered in two movements. The first is analysis: a descriptive account of how Crossings is built — its sequence, its governing images, its habits of syntax and line. The second is evaluation: a judgment of how well the collection accomplishes what it sets out to do, where its strongest work lies, and where an attentive editor would still press. The two are kept separate on purpose. Analysis that slides into praise stops being useful, and evaluation that skips analysis is only opinion wearing a robe.

The collection under discussion comprises twenty-seven poems and an epilogue, with dedication, acknowledgments, and introduction, forthcoming from Silver Current Press as an illustrated edition. Quotations follow the complete text as set for publication. Where this assessment differs from the collection’s own critical apparatus — The Poetics of Crossings, which reads the book’s figures and forms at length — the difference is one of purpose: that study asks how the poems work; this one also asks how well.

Part One

Analysis

I. The Architecture of the Sequence

The title is doing structural work, not decorative work. A crossing is a threshold event — a passage from one state to another — and the collection is arranged as a series of them: from childhood to knowledge, from health to illness, from presence to absence, from darkness toward light. The book opens in a domestic interior with “Copacetic,” a poem whose central gesture is a refusal (“‘I’m not hungry.’ He pushed it away”), and closes, before the epilogue, with “Moving Forward,” whose central gesture is an offering: “touch a hand to show we care, / massage a pained foot, / or simply listen to someone’s despair.” That is the arc of the book in miniature — from the plate pushed away to the hand extended.

Between those poles the sequence moves less by narrative than by pressure. Poems of family illness and decline (“Water,” “Last Supper,” “Fragility,” “The Teapot”) are set against poems of institutional life and vocation (“Longing,” “Session’s End,” “The Guard”), and against a small number of poems whose register is deliberately lighter (“Simply Silly,” “Carol”). The lighter poems are not filler; they function as pressure valves, and their placement is one of the more sophisticated things about the manuscript. A collection this concerned with grief needs air, and the sequencing supplies it at roughly the intervals a reader can bear.

The one structural risk is that the book’s emotional center of gravity sits in its middle third, where the illness poems cluster most densely. A reader arriving at “Water” has already absorbed a good deal; the poem is strong enough to survive the position, but the surrounding poems bear more weight than they otherwise would.

II. The Recurring Vocabulary

Four image systems govern the collection: hands, water, thresholds (doors, crosswalks, stairs), and light against darkness. They recur so consistently that recurrence has to be treated as method rather than habit — and the poet has been explicit that it is method. The repetitions are purposeful: the same truths set down again in new hands, new voices, new incarnations. What looks like repetition is recurrence, and recurrence is the argument.

The hands are the collection’s most reliable instrument. They appear as evidence (“Your hands on mine” in “The Crosswalk,” followed by the flat, unadorned claim “Proof that we had closeness for a moment”), as failed reach (“On the dock—hands cupped bending” in “Water”), and finally as moral instruction (“touch a hand to show we care”). Because the poet declines to gloss them, the hands accumulate meaning by position rather than by statement — the reader learns what a cupped hand signifies in this book the way one learns a word from repeated context.

Water carries the heavier freight. In “Water” it is the thing the dying man cannot reach; the poem’s catalog of a ruined face — “flaccid face, blue-water eyes, / rough sloped nose, broken capillaries / like tributaries on arid land” — converts a body into a drought map, so that the closing phrase, “Water he cannot reach,” lands as both literal thirst and something considerably larger. The figure is doing double service, and it does not announce the second service. That restraint is the collection’s signature.

Light and darkness are the riskiest of the four, because the pairing is worn nearly smooth by use. The collection earns it in one place decisively — the closing line of “Dark City,” “I see you move from darkness into the light and beyond” — where the phrase survives because the poem has spent its length refusing consolation, so the turn arrives as report rather than reassurance. Elsewhere the pairing is the collection’s most predictable move.

III. The Discipline of Restraint

The collection’s most consistent technical virtue is its refusal to explain. Its characteristic sentence is short, declarative, and slightly under-informed — it tells the reader what happened and stops before telling the reader what it meant. “Copacetic” is the clearest instance: a father’s four-word evasion, a four-word narrative clause, and no commentary. The poem trusts a reader to supply the grief.

This is harder than it looks, and it is where the manuscript most clearly separates itself from competent work. The temptation in poems of family illness is to secure the feeling with a closing statement; the poems here mostly decline. “Longing” is the exception worth noting because it declines in the opposite direction — the poem states its condition outright (“Mostly, I feel empty and small— / a space between words or a tiny font”) and then rescues the statement with a figure precise enough to justify it: “The colon at the end of an unfinished thought.” A grammatical mark standing in for a life’s incompletion is exactly the kind of image this poet finds when he is working at full strength.

Where restraint slips, it slips into a final line that interprets the poem it concludes. There are perhaps three or four such endings in the manuscript. They are not failures of feeling; they are failures of trust.

IV. Formal Command

The poems are free verse with an audible substrate of accentual-syllabic expectation, which the collection exploits locally rather than sustaining as pattern. Three devices recur with real control.

Syntactic suspension. “Water” withholds its only finite verb across nine lines of appositive phrases, so that the reader is held in grammatical incompletion until the white space runs out. The poem is a single suspended construction; its form is its subject.

Caesura as refusal. The collection favors two kinds of break — the mid-line dash that removes connective syntax (“On the dock—hands cupped bending”), and the hard stop after reported speech that declines elaboration. Both are deployed at moments of withheld tenderness, and the consistency suggests the device is tied to a recurring dramatic situation: the adult who will not explain.

Catalog and litany. “To Be” abandons connective syntax altogether for an asyndetic list — “the Wife of Bath’s scarlet stockings / poor Yorick’s skull / Dickinson’s sherry in the glass” — which levels literary monument and roadside debris (“a flattened sneaker on some road”) into identical syntactic weight. “Moving Forward,” at the other end, borrows the cadence of litany without adopting its apparatus. The two poems mark the collection’s formal outer limits: leveling on one side, blessing on the other.

Lineation is the element most uneven across the manuscript. The strongest poems break where breaking creates meaning; a handful break where the sentence happened to run out of room. This is the most tractable of the collection’s remaining weaknesses.

V. The Illustrated Dimension

The forthcoming edition will be illustrated, which raises a genuine question of proportion rather than a question of taste. This is a collection whose method is withholding — it works by declining to interpret its own images. Illustration is, by nature, an interpretation. Set carelessly, a picture of a cupped hand on the page facing “Water” would perform exactly the gloss the poem spent nine lines refusing to perform.

The productive path is the one the poems themselves take: suggestion over statement. Illustration that stays tonal — light, surface, weather, the grain of an interior — will extend the book’s atmosphere without closing its images. Illustration that renders the literal object at the poem’s center will compete with the poem and win, which is a loss. The safest structural solution is to illustrate the thresholds rather than the figures: doorways, crosswalks, stairwells, the surface of water, the room after someone has left it. Those images are the collection’s architecture, and they can be drawn without being explained.

Editorial recommendation: spot illustration rather than full-page plates; thresholds and surfaces rather than faces and hands; a consistent single medium across the sequence; and no illustration facing “Water,” “Copacetic,” or “Dark City,” whose endings depend on nothing intervening between the last line and the reader.

Part Two

Evaluation

VI. What the Collection Achieves

Three achievements are worth naming precisely, because they are the grounds of the assessment that follows.

It sustains a unified vision across twenty-seven poems without becoming monotonous. This is rarer than it sounds. Most first collections are anthologies of their author’s best individual poems; this one reads as a book, with a governing vocabulary and a discernible arc. The recurrence of hands, water, and thresholds is what makes the unity possible, and the variation in register is what keeps it from flattening.

It finds the sacred in domestic material without reaching for the sacred vocabulary. A kitchen table, a teapot, a pair of shoes, a hospital dock. The collection’s spiritual claims — and it makes them — are carried almost entirely by ordinary objects handled with attention. The poems are closer to Transcendentalist habits of seeing than to devotional verse: the current running through things is felt rather than named, and never asks the reader to assent to a doctrine.

It maintains emotional control over material that invites sentimentality. Poems about a father’s decline and a family’s inheritance are the most sentimentality-prone subjects in the language. The collection’s prevailing understatement is a deliberate ethical position as much as a technical one — it extends mercy to its subjects rather than judgment, and it declines to extract feeling from them for effect.

VII. The Strongest Work

Four poems would carry the collection in any submission or contest context.

“Water” is the best poem in the book and one that would stand in any journal — its suspended syntax, its drought-map figure, and its closing four words operate as a single unified device. “Copacetic” achieves more with less than anything else here; it is the collection’s clearest demonstration that restraint is a technique and not an absence. “Longing” earns its direct statement of emptiness through the precision of the grammatical figure that follows it, and it is the poem most likely to be quoted. “The Guard” is the most formally accomplished of the institutional poems, though its final image would benefit from one further pass.

“Dark City,” “The Crosswalk,” and “To Be” form a strong second rank. “To Be” is the most technically ambitious poem in the manuscript and the most likely to divide readers.

VIII. Where the Collection Remains Vulnerable

An honest evaluation has to name the places where an editor would still press. There are four.

Occasional over-explanation in closing lines. Three or four poems end by interpreting themselves. Cutting the final line or the final clause would strengthen each of them, and the manuscript already contains the proof — the poems that stop early are the poems that land hardest.

Uneven lineation in the middle third. Where the poems are weakest, the line break is doing no semantic work. This is a revision problem rather than a conception problem, and it is the highest-yield remaining fix.

The light/dark pairing is asked to carry too much. It works in “Dark City” because the poem earns it. In two or three other poems it arrives as a default gesture toward resolution. The collection’s own better instinct — the specific domestic object — is available and underused in exactly those places.

Tonal consistency across the lighter poems. “Simply Silly” and “Carol” perform a necessary structural function, but their register sits further from the book’s center than the other pressure-valve poems do. They are not out of place; they are slightly out of key.

None of these is structural. All four are addressable at the level of the individual line, which is the most favorable position a manuscript can be in.

IX. Placement and Readership

The collection sits in a recognizable and currently well-attended tradition: the elegiac domestic lyric of Irish-American Catholic inheritance, working in plain diction and short free-verse lines. Its nearest kin are the poems of family and parish that treat the working-class interior as a serious moral setting. What distinguishes this manuscript within that company is the consistency of its image system — many collections in this mode are looser, assembled around subject rather than around a governing vocabulary.

Its readership is correspondingly broad for contemporary poetry. The poems are accessible on first reading without being thin on the second, which makes the collection unusually well suited to reading groups, secondary and undergraduate classrooms, and general readers who do not ordinarily buy poetry. The forthcoming illustrated edition should widen that reach further, provided the illustration follows the restraint the poems model.

X. Editorial Assessment

The summary judgment below reflects the collection as set for publication, assessed against professionally published contemporary poetry rather than against unpublished work.

Thematic Cohesion
Exceptional — a genuine book rather than a gathering of poems
Image Precision
Exceptional — concrete, unhurried, and rarely decorative
Emotional Control
Strong to exceptional — restraint held against sentimental material
Formal Command
Strong — assured in syntax and caesura; lineation uneven in places
Sequencing
Strong — effective pressure and release; middle third densely weighted
Accessibility
Exceptional — open on first reading, durable on the second
Overall
Professional-grade and publication-ready — assessed at 9/10 for the collection as a whole, with the individual poems’ craft at the upper end of that range

The manuscript is contest-viable as it stands. The four vulnerabilities named in section VIII are line-level, and addressing them — particularly the closing lines and the lineation of the middle third — would move the collection from strong to unusually strong without altering anything essential in its conception.

A final observation, offered as description rather than praise. The collection’s governing conviction is that nothing is finally lost — that what is laid down is taken up, that the same griefs and joys return in other hands, and that attention paid to a teapot or a cupped palm is a way of keeping what would otherwise go. That conviction is never argued in these poems, which is precisely why it persuades. It is carried instead by the recurrence itself: the same images arriving again in new incarnations, each time slightly altered, none of them spent.

Editorial assessment prepared for Silver Current Press.

About the Author

James Mulhern’s writing has appeared in literary journals over 250 times and has been recognized with numerous awards. In 2015, he was granted a fully paid writing fellowship to Oxford University. That same year, a story was longlisted for the Fish Short Story Prize. In 2017, he was nominated for a Pushcart Prize. His novel, Give Them Unquiet Dreams, is a Kirkus Reviews Best Book of 2019 and a Readers’ Favorite Book Award winner. He was shortlisted for the Aesthetica Creative Writing Award 2021 for his poetry. Two of his novels were Finalists for the United Kingdom’s Wishing Shelf Book Awards. He is a professor and writer living in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, where he teaches The Art of Telling.

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